PARSON PAUL PONDERS . . . .
The sky is blue, the sun beams down on the Mediterranean coast at its best and a couple gaze into each other’s eyes, then make their vows in a beautiful Spanish church. It sounds like the perfect wedding scene and is very different from the British version where the grey skies and drizzle might take the gloss off your big day – not to mention that the bride is late and there’s another wedding party waiting to take over the church in 45 minutes.
This Mediterranean dream prompts many people to telephone me and ask “Can my daughter and her partner get married in church in Spain?” It is a lovely idea and since we are all in the European Union you would think it could be done easily but experience has taught us to proceed with caution.
Spain, like France and many other countries, views marriage primarily as a Civil Ceremony which may be followed by a church celebration. The British custom where a Vicar acts as Registrar as well as Minister comes about only because the Church of England is an “established church” and linked formally to the state. In the UK because I am an Anglican Priest I may also act as a Registrar – with all the attendant paperwork and worries about getting things absolutely right.
I have known British couples start the long form filling administration to try and get their wedding performed in a similar way here but as yet none have succeeded. They have got bogged down with bureaucracy as ever more forms and certificates are demanded of them. We always encourage British couples who want a wedding here to complete the legal and civil part in a Registrars Office in the UK with as little ceremony as possible, then armed with their marriage certificate we can offer the “real wedding” here, normally in a local church which our Roman Catholic hosts allow us to use. A Vicar friend of mine links this with the experience of buying a house. There is a day to sign and exchange contracts (that UK Civil ceremony) but the big occasion is Completion Day.
We do not refer to these weddings as Marriage Blessings but see them as more than that. We offer the full marriage service, minus a couple of legal parts which have already been done in the UK. It also means that we have a day without legal concerns and can all enjoy a real Marriage Celebration.
They can include hymns and other music although not every church is equipped with an organ or suitable instrument. Catholics often sing unaccompanied in their services. This has developed our resourcefulness and ingenuity with pre-recorded music and the like. We also encourage other family members to be involved in the service if they wish – with readings or poems.
Planning normally starts at least a year ahead although weddings can be arranged at much shorter notice. Until recently many families found a local restaurant could cater for the wedding feast more cheaply than in Britain and our local hosts put their all into a celebration like this. Photographers are welcome – except at key moments during the service itself – and we (and the local Catholic church) are delighted when a family provides flowers for decoration.
Our wedding fee of €350 reflects the cost of time, travel and preparation and compares favourably with the fee for a civil wedding in Britain. Our church receives no outside funding for the many aspects of our ministry and most couples are also very willing for a collection plate to support the mission and ministry here.
Although there are similarities with British church weddings we try to seize the novelty of our location and make every couple’s big day memorable and individual. Over the past three years I have enjoyed getting to know brides and bridegrooms as together we prepared for a day to remember – in a unique setting. It is a joyful and encouraging aspect of a Vicar’s task.
Paul Needle is the English Vicar serving local congregations in Alcossebre, Ampolla and Vinaros. He can be contacted on 662 482 944 or there are more details on the church website http://www.azaharanglican.org
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Posted by editor
on 2010-03-01 Filed under March 2010.
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